Monday, December 16, 2013

Donning the Bow tie.

Consider the simple bow tie. For more than a century, a piece of dresswear that is as much misunderstood, as it is mocked and ridiculed. Though I am not one who follows such things my understanding is that at present the Bow tie is making a comeback, and sales are much higher now than they had been for many years.
A bit of history:
For awhile now, at work I felt that I was perhaps being less formal than I should be for a professional environment. Of course, there were challenges. I work in a hospital as a Environmental Services Supervisor. (think Custodial, then the one who is the supervisor for them) In the years I have been in this position i have had various times that I wore a long tie, and had several problems with it on those days. The challenge I have is that unlike some other supervisory positions, there are times that the need is such that I need to jump in and help do some of the work with my employees. Mopping a floor, or scrubbing a toilet is not conducive to wearing a long tie simply because you cannot simply bend over a toilet to clean it or put a rag in a disinfectant solution without the risk of your tie falling in the water as well. When you are picking up recycling bags and throwing them in a bin, it can get in the way, or get soiled. So what was the solution?

After some consideration, and thinking about it I decided that in order to dress more professionally, and to be functional (as much a consideration to me as anything else) that an easy solution would be to wear a bow tie. While at one time a source of respectability, it had for a time fallen into the realm of ridicule.To me it said a couple of things: I was willing to wear a tie, and dress more professionally, I am willing to do so in a way that despite some silliness stands out, and lastly I want to care more about my appearance and wearing a tie helps aide that.

All that said, on the morning of December 6th, I wore my first self tied bow tie. Although it was a bit frustrating at first to tie, now, 11 days later, I can do them pretty well. It has changed my life in a couple of ways, and now at this point, I am interested to see just how well I can keep it up.  Ties, and specifically Bow Ties are a way to touch base with what it is to be an adult man. Just like shaving with a safety razor, or straight razor, it is a part of our heritage, and one that it is hard not to feel is being lost. Call it a practice that is being justified by a theoretical ideal if you must, but to me that is how it is.

So why self tied?
Anything else is cheating. Of course I have worn bow ties with a tuxedo, and never though anything bad about it, but there is something to tying it yourself, and having it look all the better for it. It takes some work, you have to learn a new skill, (as simple it is in retrospect) but to me there is pride in knowing that I did it, rather than having it on a string that you simply hook together.

So what have the results been?
In the last 11 days I have been called: the professor, as well as several people commenting on the fact that I am "dressed up" even though the only real change is the tie. I have noticed people being more friendly, though I suppose that could be tied to simply feeling better, so may or may not be directly tied. Now that the novelty of it has warn down some it is starting to become something that I simply do in the morning, rather than something new and cool, but I feel better about things since I started. This may turn into an annual thing wearing a bow tie every day for a time, all the next year. Who knows, but I do know that I like it, and to me, it is neat to e embarking on something a tad different.

Friday, November 8, 2013

A response to marriage is not for you.

In response to "Marriage is not for you"
I am sure that many people have read this, and were as disillusioned about it as I was.
Lets begin with the facts. Many marriages are non functional. Plenty of people marry young then realize that the person they are married to, may just not be the person they want to be with the rest of their lives. So what do they do? What it comes down to is this, some people will never be happy in marriage. It is just the way that things are. Some people have no interest in getting married, and that is ok too. So what the problem is, is that we have this idea that somehow married people are X% more invested in each other than those who are not married, which is simply not the case. I have known plenty of couples who were as invested if not more so in their relationship than those who are married, but what it comes down to is the people involved and how they are, what their needs are, and what they see their life as.

My question is, is it better to marry because that is what you are supposed to do, or is it ok to not be married and live your life as your needs dictate. Let me say this: As of Sunday I have been Married to my wife a year and a half now (It hardly seems this long) and after that time I have realized a few things. Yes, I am happier married than I ever was not married. No, it may not be for everyone. If only her happiness mattered to me in our relationship then I would not get the things I want or need as often as when we can balance our own needs with the needs of the other. But that may not be for everyone.

The second thing is that marriage cannot simply be about procreation. If that were so, any post menopause woman would have no "reason" to get married, The state of Utah allowing first cousins to wed after the age of 65 (as I understand this law), and more to the point if anyone was found to be infertile their marriage by that logic would have to be dissolved since it is only about having children. Also those who are married and choose not to have children for any number of reasons would not be allowed to be married, and yes, homosexuals would still not be allowed to be married in any place since it is only a question of procreation. The fact is that marriage is more than that. Marriage, though it may include children or not, is about the 2 people involved in it. Some people simply do not want to be married. Some get married multiple times, but that does not mean that marriage is for everyone.

Marriage has it's perks. I love my wife. I love sharing my life with her, and to be honest most of the "perks" are merely that perks. We can claim each other on our insurance, we can file taxes jointly (since we do combine incomes, it makes sense) if she got sick I could visit her in the hospital, and should anything happen to either of us, we would be the beneficiaries of the other. (Yes, she has insurance on me, and I her.) We are also recognized by the state as a couple, or a family. These are nice, but not the reason to be married, at least not for me. But I also know plenty of people who want to be recognized as such but are unable to, as well as those who have lived together long enough that they were common law married, but have no interest in anything other than what they have. Does that mean that marriage is for everyone? no.

Some people love being single. There is nothing wrong with that, that is how they prefer to be, and that is ok. Some people believe that you marry who you do and no matter how well you know them with time you will come to love them. There is nothing wrong with that either, it is just not how I see it, but that is ok, as my step mom used to say "That is why there is more than one flavor of Ice Cream". Maybe marriage is not for you because you have no interest in it, and that is ok.

On the other person's happiness being the only thing that matters: that is pure bunk, and in some cases leads to abusive relationships. If all that matters is making your partner happy but that is not their motivation, then there is a lot of room for doing everything for them, but them not doing things for you. It is a balance. It is important to do what you can to help your partner achieve their dreams, goals, and desires. But not one person on the planet can make another happy if they are not happy, you can do what you are able, but you cannot force someone else to be happy if they don't want to be. If I devoted my life to solely being responsible for my wife's happiness, then on days that were not so good, it would be my fault to. I can do what I am capable of doing, help her as I can, support her in her goals and dreams, but what I can't do is to hand those to her without her help, buy-in, and communication as to what those are, and how we can accomplish those things together. It also means that sometimes I am going to do things that are just for me, (In my case, sword fighting) because I enjoy it, and she supports me in it without having to do something she has no interest in doing. It means that I get to have some me time, and she gets some her time without having to be the same time doing the same things together. If she likes a particular kind of music, and I do not care for it, she has some time to enjoy that without me, so in a way it is helping her be happy without me having to be there for it. If there is a movie that I want to see and she does not want to see it, I go, she does what she wants to for that time and we do not have to feel like we are dragging each other to something that we do not enjoy so that we get to do what we want to.

It is not just about making each other happy, but it is about giving each other space to do some things for themselves. That is what our marriage is based on. Doing the things we love to do, sometimes with the other person, sometimes not, but allowing that to be ok. It comes down to supporting each other happiness without being solely responsible for it. But that is not just limited to marriage, it is true in friendships as well. I am not responsible for your happiness, but if I can help, then it is better for me to do what I am willing and capable to do, then not. To some people this means that you have to be married to do that, and for them, it is better to marry if they can. But that is not for everyone, and that is ok. It is ok if everyone does not do or think the same way I do, that is part of life. So maybe Marriage is for you, maybe it is not, but either way, that is ok.

Monday, October 21, 2013

Sometimes it is worth the question. Do what you love, and let those who disagree go away.

On Saturday my wife and I were walking around the last day of the farmers market, buying a couple more pumpkins for our Great Pumpkin party, and noticed that the mobile knife sharpener gentleman had his van there. On a whim, I asked if they sharpened swords, as I am sure that my sword could just a bit of refining before our party next week. The gentleman told me that they did not, (I think in part because I am sure they had bad experiences with people trying to have wall hangers sharpened, or because a mobile shop is hardly the place to work on a 4 foot long sword) but when I told the lady taking orders that I did the Historical European Martial Arts she perked right up. Apparently she is a 6th grade teacher in a public school and they  are working on their Middle ages unit in their class and looking for a demonstration on swordsmanship as an end to their unit. I told her that I had done that kind of thing before, and would be willing to do the same again if they wanted it, and gave her my contact information.

The point of the story is this: until I told her what I did for a hobby, she would not have known. For years, that was the case. I loved what I did on Saturdays, but kind of felt nerdy about it, like it was something to be a bit ashamed of, or not to put out there. Now, what I am finding is that it matters less and less. Yes, we do get on the news and the reporters laugh it off some, but to me it is about doing what you do, without pretending it is something else to "Look cool". It is an interesting shift, but one I feel is worth making. Yes, I get laughed at by people who have no concept of what I do, or how hard we work at our art to get good at it. There are plenty of people who think that walking in with no experience they could simply wail on any of us, a misconception that I wish I could change, but knowing that I can't change everyone's mind, doing what I do anyway.

It is not an easy road to hoe. There is a lot to it that seems an easy target for ridicule. Most Martial arts have some respect, ours, at this point still does not, especially when it gets mixed up with dressing in costume, talking in silly accents, and pretending that you are knights. It is not for the weak I suppose, and I have had plenty of times that it frustrated me to a point that I near quit. No one I know likes to be made fun of, no one likes to be told that their hobby is dumb or has no value, especially from those who have not given it a try, or know why you love it so.

So what do I do? Just keep doing it. Every event we hold, I will continue to send out press releases. Sometime in the future, we may stop being on the news when we hold an event, and I have to be ok with that. The key is to talk about it to whomever will listen, because despite the public shaming and being made fun of, it is something that really brings me joy, and something that makes me feel alive. It may also be something that I have to work at to do well, but I feel good when I am doing it, and that makes it worth it to me.

The world is a cruel place sometimes. Even among people who have been picked on for ages for liking comic books, or particular movies or games, if they feel they have the upper hand, they will not hesitate to turn that table and become the attacker, rather than the one being attacked. The bullied becomes the bully if they think they can do it, and the shift is easy when one thinks that one can get away with it. So the Gamer geek who loves their video games, pokes fun at the people who do their gaming differently by playing it out or doing some sort of role playing game and the "Higher" you go up the spectrum, the more people who share your love for something so it becomes more acceptable to do it. With "Geek" culture getting more and more mainstream, if your love is something that is shared by a large group of others, then it becomes ok to do what you love, and sometimes to diminish others at that expense.

Knowing that it is not easy to do what I love, and knowing that it is ridiculed as often as it is seen as something cool has not been an easy thing. But at this point, I am done hiding it because someone may make fun of it. I would rather do what I do and let the the chips fall where they may, than to pretend I do not like something just because my "friends" may insult me or tease me relentlessly because of it. I am done with that. I have found something I love, and someone who though she does not love it the same as I do, loves that I love it, and that is good enough for me.

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Post Competition, or how do deal with a bad day fighting.

Before I get started I just want you all to know that this blog may come off as rambling (More so than usual) due to the nature of some major conflicts I am and have had over how well I did at my sword groups competition on Saturday.

Excellent,
That was how I was feeling on Saturday morning as I got to the park, ready to fight, and ready to win. What followed was less than I had hoped, not as awesome as I had wanted. The first round went awesomely. I stepped in to the ring and won my first match by 5 points to nothing. This is the first time I have ever done that, especially against a seasoned opponent. "From here," I thought, "things can only go up." and that they say, is that. I stepped into my second round and my calm mind and restful continence was shattered by several points that went unanswered, shaking me terribly to the core. From there it did not improve by much. What started out as a great day left me placing in the bottom few.

The problem as I see it is that I let things get to me. A hit or two into my second match and I was letting the hits against me get into my head and keep me from focusing. In the weeks headed up to this competition I was on top of my game, there were few people who I fought that I did not match and whom if I lost to, it was not by much, so I felt I had a good chance of doing excellent this time. Where I had faltered, was my head game.

Let me explain something, a few weeks back I read a book that someone I knew had suggested in a podcast. It was about letting your body do what you had trained to do and trusting it. Though I had worked some on it, it was all a lot of principle in my mind. I saw the value in it, but had simply not let some things go once the matches got harder. I had made some minor changes in how I was doing things, and had been for years like bad footwork that helped me do better, but I was not where I needed to be, to walk away any better than I did. Just after the 3rd match, and knowing that I would not be placing this time, I was ready to pack up everything and go home. Maybe sword was not for me? Maybe I was just not as good as I had thought I was, and deserved 14th place out of 21, even for being a 7 or 8 year veteran.

And then it began, side comments of "you did really well in your matches" felt like attacks. I knew I had not done as well as I should have, I knew that I had let my second match get into my head and let my doubt run into my second match. It was not my opponents that had beat me as much as they did, it was me, who let them do it. So where did that put me? Where was I to go from here? Should I sell off all of my gear, and throw in the towel and give it all up after such a bad day? I certainly felt like it. It felt like the hard work I had been doing was wasted. This was not to say that my opponents had not done well, but I knew I could have done better and simply did not do it.

So where does that put me? Things change from moment to moment. Sometimes I am ready to throw in the towel, sometimes not. Mostly it has given me a singular focus. In the next 6 months I am setting my mind and body on overdrive, and pushing myself to do better not just next time but in the future. It is more than about losing so terribly when I know I could do better, it is about applying off time to practice, and training my mind to focus, on this exchange, in this match this time, and regardless of the outcome not get into my head if I do not do well. It is about applying myself.

I see it this way, some people are naturals. Some people, have to work harder to get to the same place, and though we may never be quite as good, we will do our best to do what we can to get there. I am one of the later people. In my life, there are few things that I am truly awesome at naturally. Let's face it, I am and have always been a big fat guy. Sports do not come quickly or easily to me, sometimes I can pick up board games or something like that quickly, but some things that I love, I will never be the best in the world at. I know that. I have made peace with that fact. When I started Highland games this summer, I was the awkward one who did not do as well as any other new person but I showed up and did what I could. I improved some, but I have no delusions that I will ever have a world record, or be the best in state. The same goes for sword.

Depending on how you count it, I have been doing sword for somewhere between 6 and 14 years. I started in January of 1999, took a break for a long time and have been back at it for something like 4 or 5 years. It does not come naturally to me. There is a lot that I still think about in a match and work out what to do when I am facing a particular opponent. The long and short of it is that I am not always the fastest, though sometime I do let myself rest on my strength to get me through more than I should. I also know that to counter strength there are plenty of things that can be done, and I am tired of them being used against me. That being the case as of last week I was still refining some thing I had seen that I did as flaws and was working to improve them. Some of it worked, some of it was so new, I had a hard time doing it because I was simply not comfortable with it yet.

So here I am. Competition went very badly for me. So do I quit? There is a lot of stigma around that question, as if to say that if you quit something you are a bad person or something for it. I am not sure I believe that, but in this case, I am not walking away. What I am doing is taking the next 6 months to refocus, and concentrate on giving my new ideas about what to do some time to blossom. Call it my Rocky 3 moment, call it a rebuilding program, call it a solid 6 month dedication to practicing outside of class so that when I do show up next time I am ready to do as well as I know I am capable of doing. It is not going to be easy, in fact I expect it to be a pain in the rear that I have no idea how I will endure, just that the only way to get there is to go through it. If my story were a Heroes journey tale, last weekend was my death, now comes the transformation so that next time I can prove to myself as much as anyone else just how good I can be, and just how much better I can do if I give myself some time and attention to do it.

Wednesday, October 2, 2013

Setting goals.

So in talking to one of my fellow students the other day something interesting came up about competitions. It was really a question of setting goals for yourself in competitions. It is easy to say that everyone in a competition is in it to win, hell, we would all like to go home with a big trophy to find a home for, but what really occurred to me is this. In a competition of 16 people, only 18% are going home having placed first second or third. In a competition of 20, only 15 percent. That does not mean that it is not a noble goal, but what it does mean is that if your sole intention going into it, you may be setting yourself up for failure. If 18% are going home winning, that means that 82% are not. In real numbers if a competition has 3 places and you are not the 1st, 2nd or 3rd, you are among the other 13 people who also did not "win".

So how do you work around that?
I spent a lot of time this summer doing Highland Games and not in sword class. While the time away was a good experience one of the largest takeaways I had was one that is shared in both the highland games, as well as running as I understand it, and that is the idea of a Personal Record or PR. It goes something like this, This was my first year doing highland games, and though I feel I made marked improvements, even at my last games I was falling behind the pack in my throws on most things. It would be pretty easy to beat myself up for it, as I was not doing as well as other people, after all, even as hard as I pushed myself, it was not as good as the other people I was competing against. But this is where PR's come in. At the end of the day I could look at my weight for distance score and if it was better than last time, I had improved. Yes, I had not, beat the people I was throwing against but there was a good way numerically to prove that I was doing better, regardless of how others were doing in events.

In sword, it is not always so easy. If you have a set number of matches and you lose them, that means that your opponent did better in that match that day, and that is a biter pill to swallow, but what if we looked at winning in a different way. Last time you only scored a combined point value of a certain number in 3 matches, this time the goal is to do a little better. Maybe you only scored 2 points or 3 a match last time, but this time you look for a score of 3 or 4 instead. Maybe, you only had 1 win last time, this time go for 2. For a goal to be good it has to be manageable, and definite. Did you do it or no? Even if you do not win all of your matches, did you apply yourself and give your opponent as many hits against them as you could? When you were going for that head shot, did you do it? When looking to hit that arm, or leg, did you do what you had intended? 82% are not going to win, how can you win for yourself if not in trophies or medals?

There is a reason it need to be specific. If all you walk in with is the idea that you are going to do your best, how can you objectively define that? How do you know that you did your best at the end of the match or the day? If you set a goal of a certain number of points you scored, then at the end of the match, you made it or you did not, if not, then it can be a goal the next time.

At the end of the season throwing, I had done better on some events, and others I had done worse or not improved, but the places I had improved, it felt awesome to see where I had gotten better, I knew what I need to work on in the off season, and what I want to do next time. Maybe I did not win first place in any event in my "class" but I had improved. Maybe in competition you don't take first or second or third, but how many points did you score, how much was scored against you, and is that better than last time. On the other hand, if it is your first competition, no matter where you place or how well you do, it is the best you have done, and next time work to make it better. We can't all place, but we can make it a lot harder for the people who end up placing, and if you allow yourself to be ok with a loss you are less likely to let that get in your head and let your first round ruin your second match or third.

Thursday, July 11, 2013

I must be a public radio geek.

This morning I had a realization that I must by definition be a public radio geek.  In my years of going to concerts and shows, of all the musicians and performers I have seen, the ones that stick out the most for me are the ones I have seen from public radio. That is not to say that I have not enjoyed other shows, it has been fun to see Weird Al the 2 times I have, and seeing They Might Be Giants a couple of years ago was fun, but when I think back to people I have seen that I truly cherish the chance to see they are all public radio people. Scott Simon, and Paula Poundstone (2 times) I not only have seen, but had a chance to spend time with working their events. Ira Glass and Garrison Keillor I have seen once each, and next week, I get to see Garrison Keillor again with Prairie Home Companion. There is a story there in it.

The first time I saw Garrison Keillor, he was coming to town solo. When I first heard that he was going to be here, I bought 2 tickets. I was not dating anyone at the time so it was a bit presumptuous, but I figured that someone would want to come to see him with me. As the days came closer, I realized that it was simply not going to be an awesome date night, so I took a very near and dear friend of mine. It was a cold December evening, but for me, I had to go. For those not familiar with him, Garrison is an older gentleman who hosts a weekly radio program called Prairie Home Companion which has been on the air it seems for as long as I remember. It was something that I think of fondly from my childhood listening on Saturday evenings. I am not a part of the radio generation, so listening to the radio in that way growing up, was different than some people I knew. It was not staying up and playing video games, but rather, on cold winter's nights listening to Garrison Keillor talk about his Mythical hometown of Lake Woebegone, and the way that he told stories reminded me of the way someone would tell a story around a campfire or around the hearth. For me, it was personal. Like you had a friend, who told you stories about where they grew up, or told funny stories and jokes about things. Several years ago, when I decided that I wanted to be an Author (an ambition that I have since given up) his books were something that I enjoyed reading and he was always an idol to me.

When I heard that he was coming to town last time I saw him, I thought that it was incredibly important that I see him, given that I never knew if or when the opportunity would happen again. So to me, it was something that I had to do. Much like the times I have seen so many of the other people or acts I have seen. Sometimes when something that is magical comes within your grasp, you have to reach out and grasp it for a moment holding it in your hands knowing that after it has gone away, you will be able to think back to it and smile knowing that when you had the chance you did what you could to have that experience. When I first saw Garrison, that was what it was for me, A chance to touch something, even if it was in a crowded theater with thousands of other people, even then, to me it was incredibly personal. I was wrong that it is the last time, as I get the chance to see him and his whole crew this time again, but there is something magical in the experience for me.

It is interesting looking back at it all to me. Sometimes life is about grasping those chances holding them close then letting them go knowing that the memory of it, and the experience would always be there with you. It is a magical thing, and I am happy to have a chance to have a new experience again.

Friday, July 5, 2013

Right and wrong

No one sets out thinking they will be on the wrong side of history. So doing things that they believe is wrong simply would not occur to people. If Batman beats up bad guys on the street it is ok. But the second that you become one of those bad guys who are only trying to achieve your objective he is a barrier to that and as such a threat to be neutralized. The problem with sides is that there are always at least 2 of them.

Hitler came into power when Germany had been beaten down by a bad end of a war, the economy was in terrible shape and the people where having a hard time just making due with things the way they were. So what does he do? He finds an out by blaming a minority of the population for the woes of the nation, promotes national unity by coming together against them, and in all of it rebuilds the economy of the nation. I am not saying that he was right, but even the US President and Prime Minister of the UK at first were impressed at what he had accomplished and how he was working to rebuild his country. In his mind, he was doing right, yes people were being killed and hurt, but it was for the sake of the country that it happened, and as such, was justified.

History does not side with him, nor does it side with anyone who lost a cause, as history sides with the victors. Complex issues become simplified for naritaves sake, and when it is written we agree with those who won. The Civil was was not just about slavery, it was as much about states rights, and the rights of self determination, things which to this day we argue about, and feel we must have. Of course since we still argue about self determination, and the ability of a state to determine it's own laws and rules, the simplest solution is to put it on slavery since we tend to agree that slavery is not such a good thing. The North wins the war, the south looses and it becomes not about the fact that Lincoln was elected without the support of nearly half of the nation, but rather it was all about slavery, since we know that slavery is bad.

No one picks a cause that they do not agree with and stays with it, otherwise how could you fight for it when it really mattered. If you did not believe in a cause and it came down to dying for it, or leaving the cause, if you did not believe in it, would you stay and fight for a cause which you were only half heartedly invested in. No one does what they think is wrong unless it has some value. Even a person who steals or robs a bank, even though they know that it is frowned upon or is wrong in the eyes of society, sees it as having some good for them, elsewise they would not do it. The shoplifter believes that his own good is more important or valuable than that of the corporation, or employees, and though it is wrong, it is still justified and he is still doing something that is in a way right for him.

Much of this is primal. We do what we do without thought of morals or what is right and wrong. When a person flips a light switch, they are not thinking about the damage the power the light will use is doing on the native species of the river system in which the damn his electrical power company gets the power to give him that electricity, Much the same way that if a person thought of the global impact of mining the natural gas to heat his home, instead, when it is cold, he turns up the heat, no further thought needed. He may be doing wrong, but not because he is thinking that in turning up the heat he will force the gas company to mine more, thus impacting the flora and fauna of the surrounding area. If he did think about it all, the larger implications of all of his actions, it is so that a man would simply not do anything, as no matter what he does he could be doing wrong against someone else or something else.

So we drive our cars, feeling like it is ok to do so regardless of the pollution it gives off. We power our homes and our machines while exploiting many natural resources that will never be reclaimed. We do this, because we think that it is right, whether time judges us as so or not. No body does wrong because they believe that not only is it wrong, but that there is no redeeming value in it. Even a person who hates their job, disagrees with what the company does or how they treat employees or each other will admit that it provides them with a source of income and thus for them the bad is trumped by the value they get out of it. They may not be right, but the ends make the means, whether right or wrong, justified.


Wednesday, April 17, 2013

It has been almost a year since I posted here. In that time, a lot has happened, some sword related and a lot not really. Last July I took second place in our sword class's competition, (Actually tied for First but lost the tiebreaker match.) In addition to that, I was selected as the "Prime" or kind of assistant to the instructor from that competition until our next competition, which happened in the last week. In that time we moved to being more full contact, adding the head as a target, as well as began adding some German to our otherwise pretty basically Italian sword style. It has been an awesome learning experience, and something that has taught me a lot. Now that it is over, I am looking at getting really serious with my training again. In addition to all of that, I have had a hard time with my studying for my College class this term and as such am planning on taking the summer off to regroup, rebuild and study the things I want to study and learn. After looking at the German techniques that I have, I feel that I could do very well integrating it into my sword style, and it is time to really put some hard work into my sword study making myself ready to do very well at our next competition in October.

In the time since my last blog, my wife and I have also bought a house, and have been having a lot of fun with that. It is amazing to me to think of where I was a year ago, and then realize just how far I have come in terms of life itself since a year ago. Now it is time to put in the work to do more, and be more. There is a lot coming up that I am excited about, but little more than the ability to train and work my heart out to become the best I can be. It is going to take work, but I know I have it in me to do better and more then I have been so far, and now that I am not helping instruct, that time is mine.