On Saturday my wife and I were walking around the last day of the farmers market, buying a couple more pumpkins for our Great Pumpkin party, and noticed that the mobile knife sharpener gentleman had his van there. On a whim, I asked if they sharpened swords, as I am sure that my sword could just a bit of refining before our party next week. The gentleman told me that they did not, (I think in part because I am sure they had bad experiences with people trying to have wall hangers sharpened, or because a mobile shop is hardly the place to work on a 4 foot long sword) but when I told the lady taking orders that I did the Historical European Martial Arts she perked right up. Apparently she is a 6th grade teacher in a public school and they are working on their Middle ages unit in their class and looking for a demonstration on swordsmanship as an end to their unit. I told her that I had done that kind of thing before, and would be willing to do the same again if they wanted it, and gave her my contact information.
The point of the story is this: until I told her what I did for a hobby, she would not have known. For years, that was the case. I loved what I did on Saturdays, but kind of felt nerdy about it, like it was something to be a bit ashamed of, or not to put out there. Now, what I am finding is that it matters less and less. Yes, we do get on the news and the reporters laugh it off some, but to me it is about doing what you do, without pretending it is something else to "Look cool". It is an interesting shift, but one I feel is worth making. Yes, I get laughed at by people who have no concept of what I do, or how hard we work at our art to get good at it. There are plenty of people who think that walking in with no experience they could simply wail on any of us, a misconception that I wish I could change, but knowing that I can't change everyone's mind, doing what I do anyway.
It is not an easy road to hoe. There is a lot to it that seems an easy target for ridicule. Most Martial arts have some respect, ours, at this point still does not, especially when it gets mixed up with dressing in costume, talking in silly accents, and pretending that you are knights. It is not for the weak I suppose, and I have had plenty of times that it frustrated me to a point that I near quit. No one I know likes to be made fun of, no one likes to be told that their hobby is dumb or has no value, especially from those who have not given it a try, or know why you love it so.
So what do I do? Just keep doing it. Every event we hold, I will continue to send out press releases. Sometime in the future, we may stop being on the news when we hold an event, and I have to be ok with that. The key is to talk about it to whomever will listen, because despite the public shaming and being made fun of, it is something that really brings me joy, and something that makes me feel alive. It may also be something that I have to work at to do well, but I feel good when I am doing it, and that makes it worth it to me.
The world is a cruel place sometimes. Even among people who have been picked on for ages for liking comic books, or particular movies or games, if they feel they have the upper hand, they will not hesitate to turn that table and become the attacker, rather than the one being attacked. The bullied becomes the bully if they think they can do it, and the shift is easy when one thinks that one can get away with it. So the Gamer geek who loves their video games, pokes fun at the people who do their gaming differently by playing it out or doing some sort of role playing game and the "Higher" you go up the spectrum, the more people who share your love for something so it becomes more acceptable to do it. With "Geek" culture getting more and more mainstream, if your love is something that is shared by a large group of others, then it becomes ok to do what you love, and sometimes to diminish others at that expense.
Knowing that it is not easy to do what I love, and knowing that it is ridiculed as often as it is seen as something cool has not been an easy thing. But at this point, I am done hiding it because someone may make fun of it. I would rather do what I do and let the the chips fall where they may, than to pretend I do not like something just because my "friends" may insult me or tease me relentlessly because of it. I am done with that. I have found something I love, and someone who though she does not love it the same as I do, loves that I love it, and that is good enough for me.
