Punchy,
I understand the Irony on this post. I am posting it just a day after I missed several days of blogs and decided I will not go back and write them. Yes, I promised you I would write every day but life happened and here we are.
It is now the beginning of September. Today I caught up on work outs, then got ready and went to an interview at Ogden Regional Hospital. Overall I think it went well but if I do get it, it will mean some big changes for our life for awhile that I had not planned on. Here is the lesson today, if you promise something to someone follow through, or if you have to change it because things come up, tell them or make sure they know. You cannot always follow through on everything you promise, but you can let people know if you need to change the terms of the promise. If you say you are going to be somewhere then can't tell them you won't so they know what is going on. Life is like that.
Sometimes you may find that you have deadlines that no matter how hard you work to meet them they just won't happen. Things come up, life happens, and you have to change plans. It happens some times, but where it is not ok is when you change plans and do not tell anyone involved that you had to. Lets say you had planned to take someone out on a date, you had talked about it for days and finally the day arrives, you ask to use the car and for whatever reason you can't or you have problems with your car, or work calls you in or something. Life's little stuff will come up, sometimes at the worst times. When that happens do what you can to do what you said you would, but if you just can't make sure that you communicate that as well.
If you tell someone you will be at their party, show up, or let them know why you can't when you know. If you are going to miss the deadline, tell the person you agreed about it to that you will miss it and when you will be able to meet it. Lots of things in life are negotiable, not everything, but some things. If you must promise to do something or meet a deadline, do it, or say why you cannot. Doing that is being in integrity.
Before I had even met your mom in person we were supposed to meet one Saturday afternoon after a family party she had done and when sword was over. I came home and fell into a sword coma and did not talk to her until after it was too late. That day I nearly lost the chance to meet her at all as she saw that action as flaky, and she did not want to date someone who forgot or let things like that slip by. Had I talked to her before it would have been better but I did not and as a result we almost never met.
Make promises, then keep them. Or if you can't tell the person you made the promise to what your plan is. You will not be as respected for this as if you had kept your promise, but it will go a long way towards keeping respect you have with people if you tell the truth about the promise then if you give them something to keep them hoping only to fail them later. If you tell someone you will take them on a date, do it or don't promise it. If I have learned anything from my time dating, it is that it is better to tell the truth than to say something to make someone feel better then never follow through. Be accountable to yourself, and to others. Only make promises you know you can keep.
Does that mean that you never make promises? Nope, it means that if you say I will do X on Saturday you do it, or renegotiate. If you are not sure if you will have time tell them you think you can but you are not sure you can do so. Make sure they know what is your word, and what you possibly may not be able to do. Make it clear so they do not build plans into it. but let them know either way as soon as you can.
-Dad
