Friday, August 7, 2015

75 Days getting through it.

Punchy,
 It has been a tough week for me, but here I am. I am not sure how to talk about being let go from the Hospital but I have to say that there are ways to get through things. It has been rough but I am finding that the way I am able to make it through is to have some sort of regime to follow, some things that I can do every day to keep me sane.
In the mornings I have been getting up with your mom in the mornings and going to the gym. It is more about doing something, anything, to get through the darkness. Sometimes you have to keep moving.
I have been out of a job 2 days so far and there are times I am worried that I will not find something to give us the life we had when I was at the hospital. It has only been 2 days but I worry. truth is sometimes you will worry. Sometimes life will let you down. Before this week, I had plans, things I was going to do. Now some things have to wait. It does not make things easy. But you have to just keep going.
This morning I went to the gym, then spent a lot of time working at the fair store. It helped. By the time I got home as silly as it was, I felt a lot better. Sometimes you have to keep going. Even if you are just moving your feet on the treadmill.
I do not have a lot of suggestions or advise today except for that. Keep your feet moving and you will get through the rough stuff. I am not there yet buddy, but I know that if I keep moving something else will come along. I will not be putting off the things I was looking forward to forever, just for now.

Soon you will be born, and I can see you and sing songs to you and hold you and that means the world to me. Your dad is doing his best to make sure you have the things you need. It may be a sacrifice, After all the plan was to be able to spend weeks at home with you after you are born, and I want to, but I know that by that time, I either need a job, or need another way to pay the bills. so I may not be able to give you that. At least not at this point and it makes me sad, I had plans, but this threw everything off. My hope is that it is not forever.

The only way through is to keep moving.
-Dad